Dear Celu & Tarun
ďAll those years ago I had spent two remarkable days with both of you when I collected priceless pearls of wisdom. Towards the end I remember mentioning if I would be able to remember all that had transpired and expressed doubts at the same time because I was then not able to fathom so many things. I remember Tarun's reassurance saying that it would all come to me when the time is right. Now that so many of those prophesies have come true, I wish to express my gratefulness.
The most pertinent issue that fuelled me then was the meditation. Since then I have had the opportunity to read works of many divergent schools. Now the understanding that happens does not stay limited to the intellect, it pierces greater depths. Meditation is no longer about striving to achieve a state, following some routines, it used to be one-dimensional, it is no longer so. I realize there are depths upon depths for the consciousness to expand, but there is a new found trust that it is not upto my small capacity to conquer. So I wait to be vanquished.
I remember the animated discussion with Tarun about thoughts & mind. Also clearly remember how my closed mind vehemently refused to hear about the higher mind. Mind & thoughts were foe No 1 and the explanation about thoughts from higher mind bubbling into the consciousness fell on deaf ears. For quite some time now I had been observing a beautiful phenomenon happening in this sphere of consciousness, the conscious having access to the subconscious and also some deeper understandings which until now have been alien to my nature. I chanced upon a book by Dr. Brian Weiss (a past life regressionist) where his subject in hypnotic states connected to the superconscious/ higher self and it helped me make the connection.
As I write it brings to mind the states that meditation bestows upon oneself. Meditation comes of its own accord and takes the mind to different heights & depths. Yes, one does develop a knack to deepen it. Initially it was fantastic to feel the cosmic oneness also bringing forth beautiful experiences. But for some reason I never got thirsty for these. My heart feels one with what J Krishnamurti says "Get your house in order", it beckons me to cleanse and longs to soar in the open skies of freedom. So these really are energy states as you had explained they happened to Ramakrishna Paramhansa. Hence ego cannot identify with quantum leaps in state.... they are impersonal.
We had also discussed about creative outlets for me. So you would be happy to know both the discussed outlets are functioning. I have started to work for Shankar' s company though more in the creative capacity like brochure making, website development etc. I have also started to write profusely. Though it is very elementary at the time being (blogs, face book, messages to friends), there is a feeling it could develop further. Anyways, I who defined myself as a recluse is enjoying connecting with people. I feel we truely find freedom when we take the definitions and labels off ourselves. Those labels that we put to find an identity but limit us.
Last but not the least I took a serious look at the astral matrix, so now it is no longer imbalanced but on way to becoming the strong reservoir of sapless energy it was always meant to be. The journey is still on.............
How have you been? This was more about me, do tell me how things are going on at your end.
A great big thank you from a deep spiritual seeker
by Rachna Gaur, Dec 2009
One of the clearest things we remember of Rachna is how magnificent her crown chakra was towering, like a great pillar of light.
At that point, somewhere during the session she had awakened her Kundalini and it was fascinating seeing a great brocade of ineer light dancing in her being.
Over the years she has shared with us the steps in her journey always focussing on the inner lights, always with a deep surety shifting deeper and deeper into an ineffable goldenness.
2 Remarkable Days...